This path is always worth walking
She fell back, as if through water or through the void of space itself. Her body limp in tired surrender, her hair and clothes swaying in its own unpredictable dance with the atoms around her. Floating backwards into no-thingness. The more she fell, the more she felt the pull. To go back to the old - to the ideas, the limitations, the carefully curated reasons as to why this moment, this place and this situation is ‘not enough’. She felt the heaviness seeping in, like a well known slimy chat up line, she itched to be rid of it’s unfavorability. It was deep, it played on all the darkness within her, collected from this life and the many before, but this time was different. She saw it - as images in her mind and physical sensations coursing through her body. She set it on fire. She set every thought she’d had alight. Shown to her as pieces of paper, she watched as the red hot fire turned them into nothing but embers - floating through the air surrounding her. She felt the release. She could feel the undying Truth that all of the chitter chatter of thoughts were meaningless, and yet they weighed her down. How fickle that something intangible and meaningless can cause so much suffering. Life has an odd sense of humour which she couldn’t help but appreciate.
Taking a deep breath the fires burning around her turned into water, flowing water. Calm but with great power, cleaning the space within and around her. Only from releasing all her ideas, could she SEE all the aspects of herself. The need for attention, gratification and all the many other games we play in the deepest hidden parts of our hearts. With no judgement she embraced them, the way the water embraced the embers with the wisdom of something that has always been, and washed them into the endlessness within and around her. Here it is, life. Where nothing is guaranteed and true love comes from a place of sharing rather than desperation or fear. She could feel it in every cell of her body, how the weight lifted to know that no job, no relationship, nothing outside of herself was needed to make her whole. Inside of her was an unspeakable knowing, something that’s lived forever and will never die. Inside her exists a wisdom far beyond comprehension, This needs nothing. It just is. We are this. We have forgotten this.
What happens when the call to Truth meets our fear, pain and wounds? Alchemy. Like a woman turned wolf you will howl at the moon in agony as the bones of your body snap and every cell of your being expands and breaks into another form. The path is not easy, but nothing good ever came cheap. This path is always worth walking. In every life, in every time, in every reality. This is the way home.
